"If people are always on the edge of their seats, we can save money on chair backs."
—Myra the Magnificent

Leading Performance

Choose two letters. Put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control whose name begins with either of the chosen letters.

Unfinity

The lucky armor stopped lightning and lasers, but sadly, also love.

Knight in _____ Armor

First strike
As this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it.
This creature has protection from names that start with the same letter as a name sticker on it.

"'Carol, blast those aliens.' 'Carol, transport these concessions.' No one cares that today is my birthday."

Jetpack Janitor

Alpha strike (This creature has first strike as long as it's blocking or being blocked by a creature that comes after it alphabetically.)

Not all tickets can be exchanged for prizes.

Impounding Lot-Bot

When this creature enters, you may say "INCARCERATE!" in a robot voice. If you do, exile another target artifact or enchantment until this creature leaves the battlefield.

"Behold the power of my hat and the ghosts of two other hats I used to own!"

Hat Trick

Target blocking or blocked creature you control gets +1/+1 and gains first strike until end of turn. If it has a hat, it gains double strike until end of turn. If you and that creature each have a hat, the creature gains triple strike until end of turn.

"What could be funnier than one big pie to the face? Unless . . . no. Could it be that simple?"
—Pietra, Crafter of Clowns

A Good Day to Pie

Tap up to two target creatures.
Whenever you put a name sticker on a creature, you may return this card from your graveyard to your hand.

Get Your Head in the Game

Flash
When this enchantment enters, exile target nonland permanent until it (this card) leaves the battlefield, then touch it (this card) to your head. When it (this card) stops touching it (your head), sacrifice it (the card, not your head).

Complaints Clerk

Clown Robot

When this creature enters, open an Attraction. (Put the top card of your Attraction deck onto the battlefield.)
Whenever you roll a 1, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token.

Clowning Around

The Astrotorium's Clown-Bots are programmed to delight attendees by any means necessary.

Create two 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature tokens, then roll a six-sided die. If the result is equal to or less than the number of Robots you control, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token.

It's not like anyone else really wanted it.

_____ Bird Gets the Worm

Flying
When this creature enters, you may put a name sticker on it. You gain X life, where X is the number of unique vowels on that sticker. (The vowels are A, E, I, O, U, and Y.)

"You will either begin or end the ride no taller than this."

Bar Entry

Choose one —
• Destroy target creature with power 4 or greater.
• Destroy target creature with any part of its head higher than the bar. (Align the tops of both cards to check.)

Assembled Ensemble

Known for their hit single "Your Wait from This Point Is Seven Hours."

Vigilance
Assembled Ensemble's power is equal to the number of Robots you control.
Whenever you cast a spell with an artifact creature in its art, create a 1/1 white Clown Robot artifact creature token.

Icetill Explorer

You may play an additional land on each of your turns.
You may play lands from your graveyard.
Landfall — Whenever a land you control enters, mill a card.

Edge of Eternities

"Finally, a place where the ingredients are as potent as my magics!"

Hexing Squelcher

This spell can't be countered.
Ward—Pay 2 life.
Spells you control can't be countered.
Other creatures you control have "Ward—Pay 2 life."

Lorwyn Eclipsed

"For those we lost, that they may forever live."
—Tapestry inscription

Chronicle of Victory

As Chronicle of Victory enters, choose a creature type.
Creatures you control of the chosen type get +2/+2 and have first strike and trample.
Whenever you cast a spell of the chosen type, draw a card.

Moonshadow

Menace
This creature enters with six -1/-1 counters on it.
Whenever one or more permanent cards are put into your graveyard from anywhere while this creature has a -1/-1 counter on it, remove a -1/-1 counter from this creature.

Faerie

Bitterbloom Bearer

Petals burst in evening hours with flitting things so fickle and sour.

Flash
Flying
At the beginning of your upkeep, you lose 1 life and create a 1/1 blue and black Faerie creature token with flying.

Lorwyn Eclipsed Promos

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Gengar holo 

Saved by the Shell

This spell costs {1} less to cast if you control a Turtle.
Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature you control. It gains trample, hexproof, and indestructible until end of turn.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

"Of course I know what you did! You always do precisely what I told you not to do!"

Grounded for Life

This spell costs {3} less to cast if it targets a tapped creature.
Destroy target creature.

Robot

Mechanized Ninja Cavalry

"This is absolutely ridiculous, Saki! They aren't meant for riding! What happened to the ninja's famous subtlety?"
—Baxter Stockman

When this creature enters, create a 1/1 colorless Robot artifact creature token.

Often enemies, always brothers . . . till the end.

Death in the Family

Exile target creature with mana value 3 or less.

Mutagen

Mutant Chain Reaction

"We live together, we train together, we fight together, we stand together . . . We are ninjas."

Destroy up to one target artifact, enchantment, or creature with flying. Create a Mutagen token. (It's an artifact with "{1}, {T}, Sacrifice this token: Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature. Activate only as a sorcery.")

Michelangelo, Mutant BFF

Each creature you control with a counter on it can't be blocked by more than one creature.
Whenever Michelangelo enters or attacks, create a Mutagen token. (It's an artifact with "{1}, {T}, Sacrifice this token: Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature. Activate only as a sorcery.")